The Blog of Fiendishness

I just read this hilarious list of reasons to date this guy named Dale. I will compile such a list for myself but I will also do a list of reasons not go out with me. This is mostly for laughs. Actually I can't think of another reason for it but some how I think it sounds better to say mostly. If you wish to see the list that the other guy did go here http://skirtman.org

Reasons to go out with me:

1. I do floss when I remember
2. I haven't shown a tendency towards animal cruelty for years now
3. I'm almost always able to open my own jars
4. I know better then to take clothes off of a bad burn
5. I never liked Britiny Spears
6. I spend money wisely
7. I don't overly use the word like
8. I don't have an irrational fear of clowns, heights, or spiders
9. I've never failed a class
10. My mommy says my table manners are better then they used to be
11. I don't deprive myself food unlike other girls
12. I do most of my homework
13. I don't like modern "art"
14. I don't read what I'm typing out loud
15. I can keep a secret
16. I won't mind if you don't give me flowers
17. I haven't done very many illegal things
18. I try not to hate without reason
19. I have no trouble counting to one hundred
20. I like broccoli
21. I've never joined a cult
22. I have a mild appreciation for nature and beauty
23. I don't have a speech impediment
24. My feet don't stink
25. I can record things with the VCR
26. I'm not often manipulative
27. I can be romantic at times
28. I don't cheat on my taxes
29. I almost never bite
30. I don't like talking on the phone or about feelings
31. I'm not allergic to you
32. I promise I won't laugh at your pain
33. I didn't eat bugs, even when my friends did
34. Reliable sources confirm that I'm female
35. I have no old bodybuilder boyfriends that could beat you up
36. I won't trade you in for a newer model
37. I'm available
38. My morals are pretty good
39. I don't have warts or large moles
40. If I don't like you I'll be kind and dump you
41. I don't have some utterly disgusting dead fetal twin hanging off my side (compliments of Kris)
42. I'm always right
43. I don't know the words to that one Titanic song
44. I can dig deep down and find 45 things wrong with me
45. I'm modest enough to stop at 45

Reasons not to go out with me:

1. I bite my nails
2. I almost always hit back
3. I'm not very mature
4. Imma nota vury gut sppiller
5. I'm self centered and arrogant, and no that is not the same thing
6. I hate combing my hair
7. I'm not fond of people in general
8. I complain even if I have no right to
9. I cage my emotion
10. I don't eat enough green vegetables
11. I don't pay enough attention to most people
12. I pay way to much attention to some people
13. I'm pessimistic or realistic, you pick
14. There are definitely better looking people out there than me
16. I have been said to have stocker tendencies
17. I don't see the point of making my bed
18. I don't really like cooking
19. I have always have bad fashion sense
20. I slack almost whenever I can
21. I don't get outside enough
22. I'm not very good at conversing
23. I have a tape fetish
24. I have a fetish with blue putty that you use to stick things up with
25. I have a fetish with putting things in my mouth
26. I have a lot of fetishes, not just the ones mentioned
27. I can be annoying
28. I'm not very tall
29. I don't have long eyelashes
30. I laugh at my own jokes or at least smile
31. I doubt your mother will like me
32. I'm not well traveled
33. I don't work well in teams
34. I'd probably do you more harm then good
35. I have bad handwriting
36. I use ( ) marks too much (but not all the time)
37. I have bad posture
38. I like fighting with cats
39. I can't guarantee that when you get attached to me you won't regret it
40. I get bored easily
41. Only those who don't know me say I'm normal
42. I'm always right *wink*
43. If I beat you at video games I will laugh
44. My uncle Dan has ruined me by making me like oldies
45. I haven't even touched the surface of this lake